Fat Fish Stops Fighting – Out of Breath

LAKE MICHIGAN – An obese Lake Michigan trout, known to his friends as “Tubby,” was caught Thursday afternoon. 

After eating his third full meal of the afternoon, Tubby set out to find dessert. He eventually settled on a shiny piece of plastic that didn’t resemble a fish at all. After he bit into the lure, Tubby panicked.

According to Tubby’s friend Cliff: “I saw him get grabbed. I’m kind of his wingman down here. Yeah we get caught all the time. Everyone has heard about… I mean who hasn’t. Fish get caught daily. It really is an epidemic; the same goes for Lake Michigan fish, they’re among the fattest in the Great Lakes.”

“Tubby tried in vein to snap the line for about 3 seconds, and then threw in the towel… He was out of breath,” said his brother, Raphael, who owns the tiny trinket shop that hawks lost lures and other long forgotten fishing tackle.

Within seconds, Tubby wafted to the surface to be pulled aboard “The Main Squeeze” appearing out of breath and lethargic.

“I could tell he was morbidly obese when I saw him, but when I was reeling him in, he felt like a little guy. I was impressed by his girth,” said the local angler Walt Thompson, who caught Tubby. 

When the hook was removed and, Tubby finally caught his breath, he struck up a nice conversation with the fishermen. He played a couple of games of Euchre and was filleted at 6 P.M.

Tubby was scheduled to have a gastric bypass procedure done next Tuesday. A memorial service has yet to be scheduled.